Okay, so I know I'm a complete failure. Can you please leave me alone now?

Tonight I started crying while we were watching TV and had to run away cos I am a loser. Now I am in my room - which I had started to tidy but now can't be bothered to finish - listening to the same song on repeat and drinking cups of tea.

Earlier I listened to loads of bhangra and danced around but now I feel flattened, and completely devoid of hope. I went to church today, which is unusual for me (it was a special occasion - I have not taken up religion, it's not like things aren't complicated enough) and the priest/vicar/whatever you call them said that the three most important things in life were: TRUST, HOPE and LOVE, of which love was the most important. I have none.

Here is a picture of me asleep in drama rehearsal. On a table.

Tonight, like last night, I'm going to sleep in #1's bed (she's away until thursday). I'm less inclined to do bad things if I sleep in there.